Pros & Cons of Having an Only Child

Pros & Cons of Having an Only Child

Written by   Stephanie

Pros

Parenthood Without the Chaos
Having an only child gives you the blessing of experiencing the joys of parenting without the overwhelm and chaos that is connected to having multiple kids.

More Time = More Experiences + More Fun
You have enough time to take your child to scheduled activities while being able to work, hang out with friends, keep up with household chores and have plenty of time to go on dates with your spouse- all without being completely stressed at the end of the day.

More One-on-One Time
As a parent of one, you can provide your child with more undivided time and attention than if you had to balance it out with other kids.

One College Tuition
Parents of only children have fewer financial burdens such as housing, food, and healthcare expenses. This is the case with college, as well. Whether you can pay for your kids’ college tuition or not is unique to each family. However, I’m a strong believer that when considering having kids, one must honestly think whether the same resources would be available for the next child. Having only one kid definitely put less restrain on the parents’ finances.

Not a Referee
Parents of an only child are not forced into being a “referee” to resolve sibling disputes and therefore avoid the typical sibling rivalry and future stories of kids being unhappy because they believed their parents took sides.

Cons

“Never Busy”
People assume that because you have one child you must have so much time on your hands. Parents with only one child will find themselves running errands and doing favors for friends and family often as they are presumed to have more free time than parents with more kids. While this may be true at times, it’s important to understand that everyone makes a decision and knows that kids require time. When a couple decides to have one or no kids, it may be to focus their attention on other goals and their “free time” should not be automatically up for grabs to fulfill other people’s responsibilities.

Interventions
Friends and family will voice their concerns numerous times about your child growing up “alone” and “self-centered” if he/she doesn’t have any siblings. Very annoying but you can get through it. My son is 9 years old and I still hear this one.

The Guilt
Parents of only one child sometimes feel guilty and will try to “make up” for this by spending countless hours playing with their child and taking up the role of entertainer. This is different from a large family’s scenario where the brothers and sisters might play together and keep themselves busy without much instruction from the parents. In an only child home, the parents play that role in keeping the child busy which in retrospect lessens all the “free time” parents of only children are presumed to have.

No Perks
Parents of only children do not benefit from some perks enjoyed by other families. This includes special accommodations for siblings at parent-teacher conferences, priority in school enrollment for siblings, family/group discounts, and higher tax benefits.

Others Thinking You Have an Easy Life
People will judge and use the fact you have only one child to diminish your accomplishments and say you have more opportunities. While it is true that the more kids, the more responsibilities the parent will have; the power of choice is often disregarded when pointing a finger to parents with only one child. It is often ignored that many parents choose to have a large family and should not feel disadvantaged as he/she had the same choice. Parents of only children should not be criticized for choosing the most “advantageous”, “easiest”, or “selfish” option as some like to say.

Interested in reading more posts like this one? Click here.

Join the Conversation!  Don’t forget to comment below